ANGER, BITTERNESS, & RESENTMENT

Well, since my blog is dealing with assisting individuals how to live life undefeated, I think that it is best to have an introductory realizing that the only way we can live life undefeated is first by believing in the someone who already has given us the victory over all things… That someone is Jesus Christ our Lord and our Saviour. Lord, because He is the Someone that we choose to follow and obey… Saviour, because He died in my place, in your place… where we are guilty of death, he died that death for us so that we can live. As I write these posts, they will almost always relate to a relationship with God and His Word, the Bible and where it doesn’t, please acknowledge what was mentioned at first that it is only by that relationship that we can overcome all things.

When I say living life defeated, I mean allowing the cares of this world to decide what kind of person you will be and what your actions will entail, what you think, and what you desire. Allowing the bad and ugly in this life to beat you down to where you stay down and choose not to get up again. That is living a defeated life, giving up, and surrendering.

Now, there are many things that can cause us to live a defeated life: anger, bitterness, and resentment, unconquered temptations, low self esteem, fear, loneliness, depression, childhood hurts, addictions, and many more. We are going to cover many of these items in the following posts. Our first set will be Anger, Bitterness, and Resentment. As we learn to conquer our anger, bitterness, and resentment, we build a new state of mind for ourselves.  

Anger – The basic emotion of extreme displeasure or exasperation in reaction to a person, a situation, or an object. The synonyms to anger are annoyance, irritation, fury, rage, antagonism, resentment, incense, inflame, madden, ire, outrage, steam up, tick off… there are so many definitions for it. I wanted to list a good amount so that you understand that “Anger” comes under many names.

Bitterness – marked by intensity or severity; accompanied by severe pain or suffering; exhibiting intense animosity; harshly reproachful; marked by cynicism and rancor; expressive of severe pain, grief, or regret. Synonyms of bitterness are: acrid, acrimonious, embittered, hard, rancorous, resentful, and sore.

Resentment – a feeling of indignant displeasure or persistent ill will at something regarded as a wrong, insult, or injury. Synonyms of resentment are: grievance, grudge, or keeping score.

When we are angry, be it for a good reason or not, for a long or short period of time, it effects us, mentally, physically, spiritually, and of course, emotionally. Anger can cause negative reactions and situations in a relationship when expressed unconstructively. So, we want to learn how to get rid of our anger, whether it has plagued us for all of our lives or is a sudden issue. As we learn these techniques,  our state of mind will also change thus allowing us to overcome even more.  Tomorrow, we will cover the 7 steps that should be taken to deliver us from anger, resentment, and bitterness.

1. Admit that you are angry. Be honest to yourself and with God. Don’t try to hide your genuine feelings. Heb. 4:13; Eph. 4:26

2. Discover why you are angry. (This may require you to look into your past or speak with a counselor.) Gen. 4:6

3. Although it is ok to be angry for a good reason, don’t let your emotions control you. (Prov. 16:32; Eccl. 7:9; Prov. 14:29)

4. Give your anger to God. Remember angry words stir up anger in others. (Prov. 15:1; Ps. 37:7, 8).

5. Forgive others who have wronged you, even if they haven’t asked for forgiveness, nor apologized. Because the purpose of the forgiveness is for your sake not theirs. Since God has forgiven you for what you have done to Him, ask Him to give you forgiveness for what others have done to you. (Eph. 4:32; Lk. 11:4; Col. 3:13)

6. Forgive yourself for things you have done and for being angry. (1 Jn. 1:9)

7. Deal with anger quickly. Don’t let it accumulate. If you need to ask someone’s forgiveness, do it. (Eph. 4:26)

Now, while we know that there is nothing wrong with being angry for a good reason, it is the holding on to anger that gives us the trouble and isn’t good according to Eph 4:29-32. You see, anger progresses into resentment and resentment progresses into bitterness. So, if we avoid holding onto the anger, the other 2 will take care of themselves. These things cause us not to be able to move on in our lives. It holds us back from accomplishing our plans and goals and even more so is a stumbling block from fulfilling what God has planned for us. Let's have a new state of mind, one that is free from such vices.  Let’s stop the devil in his tracks today by letting go of any anger, resentment, and bitterness thus allowing ourselves to live life victoriously.

Join me again for other posts & please feel free to comment.

IS SUCCESS REALLY ALL IN THE ATTITUDE OF WHAT YOU BELIEVE AND THINK?

We, as a people, like to put others on pedestals and think that they must have something that we don't have and are very special unique people.  In a sense, you are right... they are very special and unique... but so are you.  They do have something that many folk DO NOT have.

1.  They have confidence in themselves that they can do it.
2.  Many have a belief in God that keeps them going.
3.  They believe in their calling.
4.  They act on their calling.
5.  They stick to their calling even when it seems like all else is failing.

You've heard time and time again of stories where people struggled to accomplish their goals.  Actors were broke, hungry, homeless, and with a support system because of where they relocated to.  When all of a sudden, they are in the right place, at the right script reading, doing the right thing, for the right people, carrying through their purpose.

Singers were going from church to church or from wedding to funerals to seminars to bars to clubs to lounges around and around in circles and nothing seemed to be happening.  When all of a sudden, they are in the right place, at the right audition, doing the right thing, for the right people, carrying through their purpose.

Doctors and pathologists who are searching for cures for terrible diseases at every turn seem to be failing.  When all of a sudden, just the right mix happens, at the right timing, doing the right combination, for the right disease, carrying through their purpose.

MOST PEOPLE DO NOT GET WHAT THEY WANT OVERNIGHT!

It takes ambition, persistence, hard work, a steadiness, a foundation for your belief, and definitely a sense of humor.  You must have an attitude about accomplishing your goals.  You have to decide that you will do it!  You may go broke like Dave Ramsey did a few times... or even get broken as athletes do.  You might get harassed from those who are jealous of your pending success.  You may run and be weary and cramping in the side like a sprinter, but they keep going to reach the prize that is in their hearts!  They may be losing the race, but it is what they believe in and about themselves that keeps them going to the finish line to complete what they started!

DOES WHAT I THINK REALLY MATTER IN THIS WORLD ANYMORE?!

MOST DEFINITELY!  If it didn't, some of us wouldn't be here because of abortion running rampant if someone didn't step forward and began fighting for what they believe.  If it didn't, most of us would still be slaves to a taskmaster if someone didn't step forward and so "NO!"  If it didn't, alot of us would not have the opportunity to vote like we want, pray like we want, believe like we want, live like we want!  

You see, what you think about something, decides your feelings and behavior towards it.  When you truly believe IN something that you want to do, you will put forth YOURSELF, whole heartedly, in accomplishing that which you believe.  Obstacles will get in the way, as they always do.  Still, as you keep the belief in it, you will act on that belief.  You will fight for it!

MY TESTIMONY:

I was guest singer at a church this past week and an elder/friend in the church mentioned about how long we've known each other.  (23 years)  He mentioned about how far I've come in dealing with the pain, heartbreak, disappointment, and brokenness that life had dealt to me. Another church member/friend mentioned how far I've come from being in the wheelchair for the 8 years and walking in 6" heels (they were 3").  How he's seen me coming from his physical therapy to being able... to being ABLE!  Then another person spoke about how far I've come.  It embarrasses when people talk about me positively because I don't know how to take it because it feels like praise to me and I just want to praise the Lord.  As I thought about what they were saying, an urgent desire sprung up in me to let people know that what brought me through is the same thing that can bring them through anything and everything.  Now, I haven't accomplished all that I believe God has in store for me yet.  However... God. That's it... God.  A good friend of mine put it this way.  He said that I'm tenacious.  He's right.  If I believe it, I hold on to it like a bulldog locked on a throat.  I hold tight to God and what He know, believe, and feel about me.  You see, God says that I am special...  since I believe in what God says, therefore, I KNOW AND BELIEVE THAT I AM SPECIAL.  God says that I am strong and that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.  Therefore, I KNOW AND BELIEVE THAT EVEN WHEN I AM WEAK, THEN I AM STRONG because I am NOT depending on my own strength now.  I am depending on His and His is an everlasting and all powerful strength.  Jesus persisted and endured through to His calling and purpose on this earth.  We have the same thing available to us that He had.  All we have to do is believe it and claim it and then go forward to accomplish it  BELIEF REQUIRES ACTION!

HOW DO OTHERS DO IT?!?  AND CAN I DO IT TOO?!?

The way many people have accomplished soooo much is that they fight for it.  They are everyday people just like you and I.  The only difference is that they hung in there tightly grasping to what they believe and they succeeded in the purpose for which they fought!  You have the same ability that they have, hold on to your beliefs and hold on to God's hand who will guide you in the right direction in dealing with those beliefs.  If you do this, you will see such a great change happen in your life that you will be amazed.  People will look at you as they look at these other people who succeed and wonder... "How'd they do that?  They are so special!  They got it all together."  

JUST KNOW AND BELIEVE THAT YOU ARE SPECIAL AND GOD HAS A GREAT PLAN FOR YOUR LIFE TOO... NOW GO FORWARD AND ACT ON THAT BELIEF!

ENJOY THE SONG ABOUT BELIEVING: