Living Victoriously

How To Avoid Falling For A Jerk… OR Jerkette Part 4

(How to avoid falling for the wrong person)

Three Social Changes That Impact Dating

 Our society has changed in the way it functions when dealing with relationships.  There are 3 major social changes that have happened.  These are very relevant because they impact dating in a dramatic way.  Some changes may be positive and some may not be and some may be both.

1. Whereas before there was family guidance in dealing with dating, now, it is an individual choice.

Therefore, there are 2 very important beliefs that we have unfortunately lost in that social shift.

1. Families Marry Families
2. Singles Need Guidance

2. Whereas before we were a segmented society, now we have diversified our cultures.
3. Whereas before the social norms were identified of what was acceptable and what wasn’t in dealing with proper behaviour in dating, now it is something that is individual and subjective.  Now each person decides himself/herself what is appropriate according to the values that they have… sometimes this is good because they may have been raised with good values… other times, it may not be so good because they may not have received proper training in values because they may have raised themselves.

The purpose of this series of articles is to help your heart and your mind to work together when looking for a partner.  You see the head and the heart allows us to learn:  how to explore the 5 key areas of a potential dating partner; know, trust, rely, commit, and touch and allows us to learn how to balance the 5 bonding links in a romantic relationship.

ME... BLIND???  WHO??? … LOVE IS BLIND!

Did you know that you really are blind when you are in love with someone?

“Scientists have now found evidence to support the old adage that ‘love is blind’.  Through brain-imaging studies, researchers at the University College London found that “feelings of love lead to a suppression of activity in the areas of the brain controlling analytical thinking.  It seems that once we get close to a person, there is a reduction in the activity used in the brain.  Romantic love suppresses neural activity associated with one’s ability to be a good judge of a partner.  In addition, massive releases of oxytocin, dopamine and other hormones and neuropeptides in the brain create euphoric feelings that further cloud analytic judgments, masking those repeating offenses that should be obvious warning signals of problems to come.”

Science Proves That Love is Blind.  BBC News Report on article from Neurolmage.  June 14, 2004.

  

(That is why it is good to have friends and family that we can use as a guide for us because we truly do become somewhat BLIND.)


Join me again on Thursday as we cover “How To Avoid Falling For A Jerk… OR Jerkette” Part 5… (How “RAM” Relationship Attachment Model exposes jerks, protects you from blinding love, and provides you with a map for pacing your relationship.)